Interview with Bruenor Battlehammer new Defensive Cordinator

Asmodeus, Head Coach of the new NFL expansion Team the Greyhawk Gamers has moved very quickly in organizing his staff. Early this morning it was announced that the new Head Coach had hired Bruenor Battlehammer as his new Defensive Coordinator. This move actually came as quite a shock to most people as many experts and analysists expected Asmodeus to go with someone from his own background. When asked about the puzzling move The Arch Devil simply smiled and dissapearred in a cloud of fire and brimstone.

Shortly after the announcement of his hiring, Bruenor held a press conference, the following is a transcript of the event.....

BB: I will take any sensible question you have, but make it quick I have a lot to do to get ready for the season.


Q: Coach Battlehammer, do you find it unusual to be hired as a Defensive Coordinator for a football team given that you apparently have no actual football experience?


BB: You don't need to have experience with football to know what a good defense is lad. Remember I have fought numerous battles of a defensive nature and am sure I will be able to put those experiences to good use.


Q: What kind of defensive scheme do you plan to use?


BB: Listen here lad. I don't know what type of game yer playing but I am not about to let the enemy know what I plan to do. The only thing I will tell you is that the NFL has never seen the likes of what I plan on doing. 


While many more questions were ansked, Bruenor simply left the podium.

Announcing the Gamers New Head Coach....(also a change in plans)

Okay, I know I was supposed to get this next blog up sooner than this and I honestly meant too. Unfortunately between life, life, and another dosing of life I found myself not posting. While this post is later than it should be I hope you all don't mind that I also have a new and improved idea. My last post I talked about doing an NFL style draft using fantasy characters. Well instead of doing a draft I have decided to build an entire football team including the coaches! Also instead of using characters from the entire fantasy genre to choose players, I will limit myself to only characters from the Dungeon and Dragons mega-verse.

Now, introducing the Head Coach of the newest NFL franchise the Gamers I introduce....

ASMODEUS!

About Asmodeus:


I first discovered Asmodeus shortly after I began playing D&D. I remember reading through the Monster Manual and coming across the Arch Devil. Even back then there was something intriguing about this guy. Not only did he look kewl, but the fact he ruled the nine hells made him a favorite of mine through every edition of the game. I have to admit that I was bummed with the fact that he didn't make the cut into the first Monstrous Manual (which happened with all the devils and demons in an attempt to "sanatize" D&D), and was even more miffed when I learned he wasn't originally included in the Nine Hells in Plane (the Planescape setting managed to be good enough I got over it). When he made his glorious reappearance in 3rd ed. I was tickled pink.

In my time as a player I have only encountered Asmodeus once. It ended very badly for the party (which given the pick pocket roll the thief made on him was probably a blessing). In my time as a Dungeon Master I have abused, overused, and overplayed him. I have had multiple parties kill him, used him as Deus Ex Machina on several occasions, and even had him travel with the party on one occasion. Needless to say I am one of his biggest fans.

The reason why I am selecting him as Head Coach of the Gamers franchise is because I want a true Machiavellian genius calling the shots. The Numero Uno Arch Devil has managed to balance on top of the mountain of power for an untold eternity while being actively plotted against by every know being of power in the universe! This means that not only is Asmodeus powerful, but he is also able to out maneuver every other head coach in the NFL. Bill Belichick move over there is a new genius in the league.

If you want to read up on the game version of Asmodeus, this was a pretty good article.

If you would like to learn more about Asmodeus in religious mythology this page on wikipedia is worth a read.

Random Thoughts (NPC Draft!)

I know its been a minute since I last posted and that is a pretty bad way to start a blog. However my computer has been acting a bit funny and the desk I currently have is a little to short for me to be able to type comfortably.

So for those of you who don't know I am a HUGE football fan (Go Broncos!) and the 2011 Draft just got over with. The draft led me to thinking about how cool it would be to have an NPC draft. The basic idea is that each person involved with the draft runs an team of evil NPC's bent on killing the good and wonderful players. These bad guys can be from just about any source ranging from literature through video games. However special points would be given to any NPC selected from an pen and paper RPG product. Lets copy the NFL and have seven rounds which gives each team a chance at seven players. To keep it simple no trades are allowed.

I will post my first round pick tomorrow. If you want to join in feel free the only rule is that you are only allowed one guy a pick and you can't pick someone already taken.

Why I Dislike Hearing "Gaming is Expensive"

Today I am going to cover one of my biggest pet peeves as a gamer. The thing that annoys me more than anything else I hear at a gaming table is the statement "Gaming is too expensive". I guess this statement bugs me because it only takes looking at some basic math facts to prove that it is one of the cheapest hobbies out there. Don'g believe me? Let me prove it!

Last I checked a new rulebook cost around $30-$40, so we will average that out at $35 a book. Now the only book I need to play in a game is generally the players handbook. Yes I CAN buy more, but I don't HAVE too. Now for the sake of arguments lets assume that before I bought the book for $35 I had already played in several sessions (5) and I knew it was a game I would have fun playing (I expect my players to come with their own books in between their fifth and tenth sessions). Also lets assume (again for the sake of argument) that along with the initial sessions I get another twenty sessions of gaming for a grand total of twenty five sessions.

Assuming I never play the game (a very unlikely event in my experience) the price of the rule book breaks down to costing me $1.40 per session. Now assuming that I averaged four hours of game time per session (not at all unrealistic) then the rule book cost me thirty five cents an hour. In comparison an move ticket will cost you about two dollars an hour for entertainment, a gallon of gas costs over three dollars at the moment, and I don't even want to think about concert tickets.

I can already hear somebody saying "But, Da Grizz, you are only looking at one person buying one book! You know most people don't buy just one book for gaming.

To the people thinking that, I will admit they are probably right. So I will use myself as the most extreme example I can think of right off hand. I own more books than anyone I know and in fact when we had a full fledged game store in town I actually had more books than they did (which I am not sure if I should be proud of or ashamed of), so I figure I am a great example of the high side of spending money on gaming.

If I were to estimate the total amount of money I have spent on gaming in my life (including stuff I have lost, given away, had destroyed by dogs and kids etc.) it probably values in at around seven grand give or take. No I am not kidding, in fact I wouldn't be at all surprised if seven grand were a bit of a low ball figure.

Now, as much as I would like to say that I have gamed at least once a week since I started playing at nine years old, the truth is I haven't. I have however, had multiple stretches of time playing in more than one game, countless online games, and more than a few hours planning my next adventure. So, let's just say I have managed to play an average of one four hour period every other week for the last twenty eight years (again I don't think this is at all far fetched, specially if you include planning time). That gives me a grand total of 3,136 hours of gaming. Admitted compared to the seven grand I have spent on the game its not quite thirty five cents an hour, but when you add in the joy I get from having the collection, the fact other friends have used it, and the fact I have spent a great deal of time reading it all, I feel I get an exceptional value for my money. Not to mention I am now introducing the kids to the game and I don't plan to quit gaming any time soon, which increases the value of my gaming books even more.

So next time I get on you to buy your own PHB or the next time you are thumbing through a book that you think might be a good fit for your game, don't tell yourself it's to expensive. Instead look at the fact that you will probably get a better value out of that book than almost any other hobby out there.

How it All Started

I started playing dungeons and dragons in the summer of 1983 at the age of nine. My Uncle had made the mistake of leaving his books laying on a table one day and while I knew better than to actually touch them in any way I spent hours sitting in a chair looking at their covers. I remember that feeling today as though it were yesterday. How the pictures on the cover of those books beckoned with a seductive promise of unexplored adventure. From that day on I begged my Uncle to let me play and to make a long story short, my Uncle eventually relented after I proved to him that not only could I read the books but I could understand them. I even had to pass a test he wrote up along with write a five hundred word essay about the game (though to his credit he let me slide at 300).

My first character was a Dwarf Fighter named Melvin Mischief Maker III. His first action was to challenge a farm boy in the Village of Homlet to an arm wrestling contest (which sadly Melvin lost). After a notable career within Homlet, the Temple of Elemental Evil, and many other adventures, Melvin retired a wealthy Dwarf of ninth level. Since that first character I have consistently gamed for the last twenty eight years. Some times I wore the players hat, sometimes the Game Masters. I have played everything from Dungeons and Dragons Basic through New World of Darkness. I have honestly spent more money on gaming than I probably have on cars and I am more than happy about that. In short I am a gamer and proud of it.

I really don't know what this blog will entail other than it will be about gaming. I plan to post journals for each of the four games I am currently involved with (three as GM, one as player) as well as share my thoughts about various aspects of gaming. I do hope I get some steady readers, but I also am doing this blog because I feel I need a space to voice my gaming experience. Finally I hope to enjoy this blog as much as I have enjoyed gaming...