The Things in my Head

For now, I think I am going to use this blog as a place to gather my thoughts each night. I was using Facebook, but really I think this is the kind of thing blogging actually was started for. My thoughts will still be focused on gaming, and I will still likely post a very eclectic series of topics. This is my blog, I can do what I want with it. If an article gets 5 thousand hits (and some of mine have) then I am thrilled, if it gets 10 hits I am happy.

I think that's something new about me lately. I am not near as worried about reaching an audience as I was when I first started this blog. I still want to reach an audience, but I am not desperate for an audience. I feel that same way about my Patreon. I think I am finally at a point I am more worried about creating than I am about "making it pay for itself". In turn, this is going to mean I put out a better product and am thus more likely to make money. Kind interesting how that works.

I am so close to being done with my first short adventure. In fact, I am at that close enough point I can feel the excuses to not finish building up. There isn't enough art, I didn't make the adventure interesting enough, all this and more are sitting there in the back of my head telling me I'm not good enough. I know I shouldn't listen to these voices, but it's so hard not to. It's so hard to finally push past all the damn negativity in my head and look at what could actually go right.

Yes, there is a chance that I might fall flat on my face. However, what happens if I do? What happens if everyone hates what I did (and I doubt that is going to happen). Nothing really. At worst I am out some money I spent on artists and editors, and I am out some time. Neither of these is a big deal. Instead of thinking about what could go wrong, I need to think about what could go right.

It is totally possible that when I release this short module people like it. Not only do they like it, but they like it enough to tell other people they like it. Maybe some of those people who hear that will decide to give my Patreon a chance as well. Next thing I know I have doubled my subscribers. I know, maybe I should dream that I will wind up with hundreds of new subscribers, but I tend to be realistic. It's a good short adventure, but it's not world-changing. I think the most likely thing that will happen is I pick up a couple of subscribers and that's pretty okay.